I’ve spoken with a few of you since my last bulletin post about this hero we got in Crumble, and I’m hearing a lot of mixed messages.

Edwina Packard writes…

Dear editor,

I know everyone is gushing about this damn hero, but all I gots to say are bad words. Words my mammy would slap me up on the head for uttering.

This so-called hero keeps coming into our homes and taking stuff what don’t belong to her. Not even says a word, just waltzes right in, opens up all our drawers and pockets whatever she likes. She grabbed Edgar’s shotgun – a family heirloom, you know how rare guns is in Oughta Go – and we couldn’t so much as breathe at her without frettin about being shot or something.

Anyone else having this issue?!

Edwina

However, our next writer has had a very different experience:

Dear editor,

Let me just say that this hero is the best thing that ever happened to me. I got into a fight with a buddy of mine in the Queen‘s gang, but bugger me sideways and call me a nancy if I could lay a finger on him after he ran like the coward he is … was … back to their town. 

Well, I asked our brave hero to go have a word with him, if you catch what I’m hinting at there, and strip me naked and cover me in butter for a Waste Beast, she actually went and did it.

Best thing that ever happened to this crappy town.

Anonymous

We’ll follow this story as it progresses, so stay tuned for more updates folks. I’ll post a bulletin when I know what to tell you.

– Flynn Harris